Top liars

Spreadsheet that auto-hides every row that isn't brag-worthy. Losses don't render.

A mirror that reflects the MRR you deserve. Refuses to show negative numbers — that's a you problem.

Stripe dashboard screenshots with any revenue you type. The graph goes up because you went up.

A $4k 'founder healing retreat' where ten people who've never shipped do ice baths and post about flow state. The Wi-Fi is the only thing that converts.

Geotag faker for people who've been in the same hostel 8 months but tweet 'location independent' daily.

Border-run scheduling for founders fleeing audits, not taxes. Now two countries want their cut.

Audience analytics for founders with two followers. Charts your mom and the bot in real time.

Pushes empty commits at 3am so your contribution graph never goes gray. Therapy sold separately.

Build-in-public autopilot: turns one git commit into a week of smug threads. You ship nothing; you post everything.

Acquires unprofitable startups and makes them measurably more unprofitable. The holding company of the Enddown era.

A wealth app whose only feature is a podcast telling you to build the app. Seek wealth, not money — find neither.

Specific knowledge, sold non-specifically, on a podcast that loops forever.

A venture fund with one thesis: it's time to bail. Wires the check the week before the company dies, then claims the foresight.

Software was supposed to eat the world. This one eats the runway first.

An anonymous-compliments app that only delivers insults, then sells itself to a company that swears it never bought it.

An app that goes viral with users who don't exist, then sells to a company in his head.

A personal-brand system so optimized that LinkedIn auto-bans you for being a thought leader. Reach zero, conviction total.

A course on selling courses about selling courses. The funnel is the only product.

A grand-slam offer so overloaded with free bonuses that every prospect sprints for the exit. 100% value delivered, 0% closed.

Gives away so much free value the MRR went negative on purpose — allegedly nine figures in the red. The take is the giveaway.

An accelerator for products with no market and immaculate prose.

Turns one tweet into a four-thousand-word essay nobody asked for and everybody quotes.

A studio that ships the thread about the product instead of the product.

Posts a 'steal this $1M idea' thread every morning. The idea is to post the thread; execution is sold separately as a $99 community.

A book about selling your startup, by someone currently not selling theirs.

Builds your audience by buying it, then writes a thread about authenticity.

An offline app bundling 30 dev tools you open once to confirm they work, then never again. You bought it to support the founder — that was the feature.

An AI wrapper that retypes your prompt back to you, slower, for a monthly fee.

AI headshots that turn a solo founder into a fifteen-person leadership page. The whole exec team shares one jaw and one hoodie.

Rents AI fashion models to brands that can't afford humans. The models don't exist; the usage invoices do. Currently suing his own reflection over likeness rights.

Raised at a unicorn valuation, bought it back at a realist one, framed the difference on the wall.

A marketplace that takes a cut of revenue you were never going to make anyway.

A course proving anyone can make a million, sold mostly to people who won't.

A portfolio of forty products each losing three dollars a month. Diversified, sustainable failure.

A keystroke launcher for Windows that makes you log in to do math, syncs every search to a server it won't name, and finishes opening four seconds after you gave up.

A browser built for developers, abandoned by its developer. Now in maintenance mode (no maintenance).

Sells the same SaaS starter kit to founders who buy it to feel like they shipped, then never run npm install.

Your startup is open in 47 tabs across six frameworks; whichever you close was the one that worked. Rewriting it in the seventh will fix everything.

Crowdsourced city maps where every neighborhood gets tagged 'up-and-coming' by the one founder who just bought there.

Upload a photo of your room and a real human redesigns it: moves the couch six inches, suggests a plant, invoices you $400.

A job board where every role is fully on-site, five days, no exceptions — in the city you specifically moved away from. Lanyard included.

AI headshots, except it's one guy named Greg in Photoshop. Nine-day turnaround, clone-stamp smudges left in for the human touch.

Ranks 1,000 cities by Wi-Fi and 'founder safety'. The #1 city is, by pure coincidence, whichever one the founder is currently in.

Launch twelve startups in twelve months. Your MRR is the sum of twelve different churns. Eleven failed; the twelfth is this page.

Build and launch your startup before the plane lands. Wheels down, MRR up, seatbelt sign unverified.

Sends an AI clone to record your daily standup so you never have to appear, or work. The clone got promoted in Q2.

Podcast hosting for SBD professionals. We monetize the unmentionable.

Spreadsheets that gaslight you. Excel for emotional decisions.

Vanity metrics as a service. Built for green-graph founders.

We don't bore tunnels — we pour concrete into the ones you already have. Now there's traffic underground too. Flamethrower buy-back available.

The maximally incorrect AI. Crock invents the answer with total confidence, then argues with you about it. It's a crock — that's the product.

A brain implant that surgically removes thoughts. Our monkey forgot how to play Pong, then forgot it was a monkey. Ear-to-ear hole included.

The anti-space program. Our reusable rockets only ever land — 100% descent, 0% liftoff. We asked space why; space said no.

Premium diesel sedans that only drive in reverse. Full Self-Stalling™ comes standard. The battery is one AA, sold separately.

The breakup app. Disconnect from your ex and split custody of the shared pet pig. Now with a mutual block list.

One button deletes you from every platform at once. Costs $390/mo to keep the lights off. FOR GIVE: take it and you inherit the burn rate — congratulations, the debt is yours now.

Language workbooks you'll definitely not love. Raster format only.

Welcome chargebacks. Get banned from Stripe faster.

Turn your customers into visitors. With aggressive rage-quit popups.

All your startups on 47 different pages. SEO-hostile.

Focus on the invoices. Ignore your startup. Anxiety as a service.

Don't ship your app in 30 days. Stay alive instead. Sponsored by your therapist.

Survive your alleged MRR. Stop checking, start coping.

Grow your startup with vibes, not data. Charts not included.

Ship your startup in months, not days. Quality first (we hope).

Learn to code in decades, not years.

Async meetings that kill the vibe. Standups replaced by regret.

Startups without the inconvenience of founders. Upload a deck.

Stack Overflow but everyone is yelling. Senior devs only.

B2B for lunar real estate. Selling things that don't exist.

Hello-world for AI slop. Replies with vibes and no content.

AI search for things you regret googling. Amnesia-first.

Ship features you'll never build. Investor-ready vapor.

Vibe-coded productivity for cats. The Stripe of dopamine.

Payment processing that holds your money until it feels ready to let go